At the beginning of the month, I wrote about some of my fears with the promise that I would tackle at least one of them in my next blog post. I thought about whether I should just pull the trigger and post a few photos of myself in red lipstick with my ‘fro askew or in a bikini, but deep down inside I knew that would be taking the easy way out. Since one of my deepest fears is public- speaking, I knew that was the one I had to tackle.
Though I fear it, I also long to be able to command and inspire an audience like Viola Davis’s historical Emmy speech in 2015 or Brene Brown’s amazing Ted Talks about the power of vulnerability. And, don’t get me started on President Obama with his eloquence and perfect comedic timing. Perfection.
That last public speaking I did was the final presentation for my entrepreneurship class this summer. It started with me pretty much reading my notes verbatim with my head down, which caused the facilitator to promptly walk over and pry my notes from my hand, telling me that I didn’t need them. “Yes, I did” I thought desperately as I clung to them as if they were my life-line, even though I had spent significant time prepping for the presentation I knew she was right. Ultimately, I sputtered and sweated through it much like this hilarious clip from the Bridgette Jones movie. This fear isn’t because I’m shy or have nothing to say, I mean I majored in broadcasting in college and was a cheerleader growing up, I’m just ragingly insecure about my story-telling ability. It’s so bad that all of my siblings except one the youngest plus many friends have had weddings and I have never given a toast or speech on their behalf. I’ve avoided it like clowns, white shoes and red lipstick but now no thanks to Camille, I know it’s time to put my big girl panties on and tackle this thing head on.
So, I signed up for an online public-speaking course where I can gingerly work my into it. Who knows maybe I will be giving a speech at my own wedding – while wearing red lipstick. Boom! That’ll be the sound of me dropping the mic when I crush it.