We’re excited to have a special guest post for today.
Let me introduce myself first (sort of). I’m a 44 year old single mom in my only serious relationship after 20 years of marriage. I am now just learning to be with someone again.
Throwback for a minute…
I threw my husband out in 2012 for cheating, but in reality he mentally and emotionally stopped coming home in 2008. By the time he left what was once our home I didn’t even really care about his cheating, I just needed a concrete reason to end our relationship. The truth is we were WAY over and I was WAY tired before the cheating happened. I do think the person in me who truly believes in marriage left that day with him but not the one that believes in love. I think I actually realized that love was more important in the days and months that followed. I realized that feeling loved was more important for me and my kids.
Fast forward to now…
I have been in a loving relationship without any talk of marriage for the last 2.5 years. I met my “partner”, “life partner”, boyfriend on an online dating site after swearing that I wasn’t the type to find love that way. I went on a lot of first dates for the first six months to a year then I took a break for a whole year before going online the end of December 2013 to search for men for a friend of mine. My friend went on a lot of dates which left me looking for potential dates for her, then for myself while my kids were not home. I sent emails, liked one or two photos, chatted with one guy because I felt like I had to chat someone but soon got bored with that. I took a break for a few weeks then found myself mindlessly scrolling through pics when I saw this guy wearing the ugliest Christmas sweater. I liked his photo and then logged off. We actually ended up emailing each other, meeting in a week and we’ve been together ever since. That was February 2014.
Now I can say, I have not been in a more drama free, loving, honest and super sexy relationship. Friends and family ask me if we will marry, I don’t know. All I know is that I feel loved and protected without the hard promise of it all. If I had to describe it, it would be like water and air and ice pops to me because I need it and love it just as much as I did the thousands of times before. I know now that the quality of the relationship matters more than the vows. I won’t say no if he asks but I don’t need it.
Anonymously & Happily Single